Happy Birthday Daddy

 All I have is because of your Blessing

Without you, I would be nothing

Right from the first breath that I took

To be like you is to what I look

The pain and hardships you went through

You did your best in all you could do

To give us a life as easy as it could be

And to live a life which could define me 

Whenever I felt I was lost in this world here

You and your advice would always be near

The respect and love for everyone around

Is what you taught with everyone you surround

With your name I came to this world

And I hope to keep it up for generations to hold

Thank you Dad for letting me be me

Thank you for being as wonderful as you can be

Happy Birthday Daddy!!

Happy Birthday Mummy

 For all the months you kept me

In your womb safe and sound

You made sure I could see

This life of mine and everything around

Through all my ups and downs

You stood by not shaking your ground

Making sure this boy doesn't drown

In the mess he puts himself around

Nothing that I can do in anyway

Can make up for the pain you took

Because even till this day

Your food, your care and love is all I look

I know I am still not there

That dream you saw for me

I will do my best no matter where

Happy Birthday Dear Mummy

To Be Happy When My Life Is Done

 Words that pricked like a needle

Were nothling less than being fatal

I try to get it out of my way

But it is just there to stay

It feels like a crown of thorns

I am caught in a sea of storms

Filled with unrepairable thoughts

Unsolvable puzzle of all sorts

I have seen the pain

That brought me no gain

It was not just about being hurt

It was my empire full of dirt

But I will start a million times again

To get out of this feeling so insane

Taking a ride into the shining sun

To be happy when my life is done

Mom and Dad

You know when I was a child
And in all of my innocence
My daddy would do all I want to
And live as I wished he do

As for my mom what can I say
For I was always so sure
I was loved in a way
That no pain I would endure.

If with mom I would disagree
To get my way to dad I would run
When with dad I could not what I see
I would prove to be my mom's son

To my life's end I will pray
For my mom and dad to stay
No matter how far from them I run
For me they will ever be the first one

Love and Rains!!!

Saw you in the first rain drop

That fell down the sky this year

Felt like a new beginning to my life

Giving me no reason to fear

You kept pouring throughout

Just kept giving me all I need

Was it really you or just my doubt

That I could see you in every deed

And then I realized the truth

Thing with me that always has been

And with the rains too it is a fact

Once the season ends it is not seen 

Would I then again be left searching

For that drop that had started

What I thought was never ending

And again be left heart broken

Confused Mind!!!

It is meant to be

What it is not to be

This life gives to me

Things I don't even see

The love I seek to find

Is all here in my mind

If I could just put aside

The worries and its allies

If it is not what i have yet

Then when will it be set

The day I would be left

With the one I have not yet met

The Wish!!!

You and me where meant to be

Together as life would want to see

The love we always wished

The life we just lived

Though it was not just to be

What I thought I wished to see

The love had that we wished

The life that we would have lived

Tomorrow it could just be

The life we always see

What we always had wished

And the life we always lived

But if this could just be

For all that I could see

It's now what I wished

If we ever lived!!!

YOU

Heading for something,
Where I've wanted to be.
All that is missing,
Is for you to be with me.

 You are the one I want,
I give myself to you.
Everytime you give the count,
I feel myself strive.

You being there,
Is all that I care.
Baby without you,
 I'm left with no clue.

 You are everything to me,
I give myself to you.
I just want to,
Always make you feel new.

An Autobiography of a Nun - A Review..

An Autobiography of a Nun.... One of the most controversial books of the Catholic Church. It tells you about the facts that happen inside the four walls of a Convent. My first reaction when I saw the book at CrossWords was like, "Wow.. Now this is something to read.. Let's see what it has that i would not know". It had much much more than I could ever think about. It speaks about Priests being involved in sexual practices with nuns. It tells you about how nuns are discriminated withing the convent. Have you ever heard of a High Class nun and Low Class Nun? I mean common.. Stop insulting the Profession of God. Even today donations are taken in the name of Education.. Damn it.. Just because others do it, does not mean that we should also do it. We understand that we need money to run institutions and develop institutions, but please stop forcing the students to give it... We have all rights to ask for donors and we know we will get them. Ruining education at the expense of Money should be considered as one of the biggest crime in India.. That is why we are not improving. There is much much more in this book which says about how a nun who wanted to oppose these things was troubled and how so called officials tried to prove her as a mentally unstable person. I can only write and ponder.. But I'm looking for an appropriate answer to all my questions. Is there anyone here who can give me an answer???

Lost But Found... Strayed away But got back..

It's been a long time.... I was lost but now I've been found.. I had strayed but now I've got back... Lots of games (Thanks to facebook) and loads of work (thanks to office)... Time just got out of hand.... Sometimes I think what is more important. But just cannot figure it out. How is it that I do not do what I want to.. But i feel happy with what I'm doing... I know it sounds confusing but it always happens. Things go from good to bad and from bad to worse. But at the end of it all there's always something that I've learned. A lesson that makes you think, makes you ponder, makes you visualize things the way you would have never done before. I sometimes think WTF am I doing but then I always say to myself that what 'm doing is What I Am and What I want to Be...

Want to Get Back.... I really miss those times....

Hey guys. It's time that I face it. No matter how much i try to run or try to be away from, I just cannot. Everytime I'm depressed, just the thought makes me feel so good. I sometimes think that what I did earlier was wrong and stop from moving ahead. But the feeling of not being there when really needed kills me from within. I think i will get back... Before it's too late... Just cant stay away..

The One

I was walking down the road,
And found my life had no trace.
Till I came across this mode,
Where I saw a sweet little face.

Those mysterious eyes stared at me,
Her face dripped with innocence.
Thought it would be she,
Who could get me out of the fence.

Just as I could see you,
In time you slipped away.
There wasn’t any talking to you,
Inside me I had something to say.

I wrote this one for you,
Of all the things I could do.
I could feel the presence of you,
No matter what I went through.

I close my eyes when I get to sad,
Close my eyes and I count to ten.
And just when I think I'm getting mad,
I can feel you next to me then.

You were the one who gave me life,
You were there and I felt warm.
And as I was about to strive,
You just kept me numb.

I want you to be there,
When things will change.
We would always be together,
And never get estranged

Inside of Me

To the world and back I go,

Not knowing what I should know.

In the boat of life I row,

Through rivers and hailing snow.

My strength these people ask,

They don’t know who I am.

Right from dawn to dusk,

All of them just give me a damn.

Caught in a section,

Where the words are made of steel.

My life seeks redemption,

There’s nothing left in me to feel.

Far across a distance,

I can see the vision.

It’s telling me of the menace,

I’m stuck in all its dimensions.

I know I’ve been this way,

For all the things I have seen.

In me I have something to say,

That’s just how I have been.

There’s nothing much left in me,

As I can see myself drown.

After all what I have,

Is just the thorn in my crown.

When I reach my end,

I can see a fading light.

It looks like someone’s send,

A help for me to fight.

When I get my time,

I’ll put my head to rest.

I’ll just keep walking,

Inside of me again.

Mumbai at War

All of you guys must have heard about all the stuff going on in Mumbai. Cowards creating terror at the risk of innocent lives. When I was young, I never knew what terror was. It all started at the age of 8. At that time too the riots of 1992 and the blasts of 1993 did not have an effect. I still remember on the ground floor of the quarters we lived in were 2 families. A Hindu family and a Muslim family and I just asked, "Aap dono kyun nahi jagad rahe ho?". And my aunts just looked at me. One of them just said, " Beta, Humme kisise nahi jagadna. Hum sabhi yahi ke hai." I just felt ashamed and went back. After that came all the blasts in the buses and taxis. And then came the dreadful July Train Blasts. I was 21 then. A full grown youth studying in an hostel and could not even connect to my parents. I knew that dad and mom travel thesame route. Dad would travel late. But mom would travel around the same time. I did not know what to do. I just wanted to talk to them. I wanted to hear them. I tried connecting to dad. I tried connecting to mom. I even called my landline number. But to no avail. Nothing was getting connected. I tried the whole night. Right uptil midnight. And finally i got to speak to mom and she told me that even dad's fine. That was the time terrorism actually sunk in. I was scared. For the first time. I had felt it in me. Something inside told me what it is and what it can do.
And here I am writing today. 50 hours after the terror attacks all over Mumbai. I asked myself why? At the cost of whom? Who is responsible? Loads of questions flashed into my mind. I had no answer. I was on my way home when i heard the news. I thought of landing home after a couple of drinks. At the bar there were different people. 2 young guys just drinking anf fooling about how useless the Indian security is. 2 old men who were regulars and seemed to be entirely lost in the news. 1 guy even got a call from home. And I was sitting there, with all the questions flashing my mind again and again and again. And then i cursed the politicians. Why on earth are they like this? Why dont they do something? Cursed them the whole night and went to work the next day. The bus was empty. My card playing partners had skipped work to remain safe. But i did not. I was on my way. What made me do that? Why did I not think about staying at home? But I did not want too. I wanted to prove to all the terrorists that I'm not scared. Was it my arrongance? No. Was it the love for India? Could be. Was it just something stupid? Could very much be. But I did it bravely.
What I want to say here is simple. They are doing shit to us. And we just get back to our simple lives. It just does not matter. There is something missing. Something.....